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Reading Room Articles
My first mentor was a US Navy Master Chief Petty Officer. She had the biggest presence of any one or anything I've ever encountered short of a nuclear aircraft carrier, and it's followed me throughout my working life in the form of the best professional advice I've ever been given: "Find someone who can tell you from experience the things that you need to know, and follow their example." What she was really telling me was that I needed a mentor, and in taking the time to give me that advice way back in 1986, she was acting as my very first one. That advice has brought me great success and exceptional friendships, and it's taught me a thing of two that I'd like to share with those of you who are looking for mentors to help you set and achieve higher goals. What's mentoring all about? A mentoring relationship is an agreement between an experienced individual and a less experienced one to work together toward developing existing talents, discovering new ones, acquiring new skills, and building self-awareness. Typically, the relationship is established with the primary goal of the less experienced person (the protégé) learning from the more experienced one (the mentor); but in the most successful relationships, both parties learn as well as teach so that the end result is that the protégé experiences improved performance and the mentor hones his or her leadership skills. Entering into a relationship with a mentor usually begins with little more than an agreement from them to be available when the you need guidance; a mutual agreement to devote time to communicating with each other exclusively about the possibilities of your career; and a commitment on your part to respect your mentor's time and experience by allowing them to guide you in your career decisions. These are the building blocks of a good mentor / protégé relationship, but a key decision has to be made before you even reach the point of forging a relationship. Arguably, the toughest part of developing a relationship with a mentor is in finding the mentor who's right for you. Here are my seven best tips for doing exactly that: Know your professional self: This is an exercise, so once you've read it through, you'll want to come back and actually do it. Sit down in a quiet place and consciously think about where you are in your career right now, and where you would like to be a year from now, five years from now, ten years from now... imagine what you would like to have accomplished by the time you're ready to retire. Spend some time getting comfortable with this picture of your future. Once you've established a vision for your professional self, come back to the present and honestly assess what type of personality you have. If you need a little help pinning yourself down, there are a variety of personality tests available online to help you gain some personal insight. A resource list is provided at the end of this article. Knowing yourself professionally requires that you get to know your comfort zone when it comes to change. Taking somebody else's advice isn't easy for many of us, so that alone might represent a big change in your way of doing things. Acting on that person's advice might also require you to make major changes in your way of thinking and/or doing. Think about how you've reacted to change in the past. Think about what kinds of specific changes a mentor might suggest that you make. Often, we have an intuitive grasp of what we should be doing to further our careers, and just need someone to help us put those thoughts into action. You may be surprised down the line by how closely your mentor's direction resembles the hypothetical changes that you pose to yourself in this exercise. Once you've considered your strengths and weaknesses, define how a mentor might guide you through your growth. Can they lead you by example? Can they help you develop specific skills that you lack but that they possess? Can they help you set and achieve goals? Take time to explore the whole mentoring scenario in your mind and develop a personal vision of what you hope to achieve. Only when you have defined what you expect to gain can another person support you and help you grow. Take the initiative: Mentoring relationships often form quite naturally when two people at different stages of their careers but with complementary personalities and affinities come together. Occasionally, finding the right person is as easy as looking to your immediate supervisor. Consider yourself lucky if that happens for you, but if it's not that easy, don't wait around for the right alliance to materialize. This is especially important at the corporate level where you might have to look outside of your company for someone in your field of expertise who has achieved the degree of success that you want for yourself. Design a deliberate course of action to find the mentor that's right for you, and incorporate some or all of the following tips in your search. Ask around: In an industry where referrals are so important, this shouldn't be a tough one for you to grasp. Tap into your friends' and associates' networks to expand your reach. Ask a friend, and if they can't make a direct suggestion, ask them to ask around for you. This is how networks grow. When requesting referrals, be clear about what you're looking for and why. It'll save your time, your friend's energy, and the ultimate contacts' efforts. Keep an open mind about who your mentor might be: A mentor is someone who will help you grow in the areas that are most important to you. This person is not necessarily your supervisor, or someone with a high-ranking title. Perhaps your best mentor isn't even within our industry. The key is to find someone who exemplifies the traits and skills that you want to adopt. My current mentor found me quite by accident and talked me into taking my life in a whole new direction. Keep your eyes - and your mind - open not just to what's in front of you, but also to possibilities beyond your immediate grasp. Look where you're likely to find: Keeping an open mind doesn't mean just sitting back with wide eyes and ears and waiting for something to happen. You still need to seek the right person proactively, and that means looking in places where the right person is most likely to be. Likely sources include your management team, the next step up the organizational chart from your own, local and industry associations, and online communities (like the SMMOnline chat rooms or bulletin boards, and Lisa Trosien's APT list). You might also consider working with a professional coach like Terri Norvell or Ernest Oriente. Also consider people in your non-workplace communities, such as retirees, local business owners, and people associated with your hobbies and extracurricular interests. Know what you want to gain from the relationship: This is where I get inevitably "zen" about the whole mentoring thing: you can't have a path without a destination, and you can't have a guide without a path. Approaching the whole issue with a clear understanding of your purpose and desired results will help you: (A) know when you've found the right person; (B) ensure that you and your mentor find mutual value in the relationship; and (C) eliminate any potential confusion about roles and expectations. Think about people who have been your mentors in the past: Whether you called them "mentors" or not, you've probably had several already. Think about the people who have helped to shape your life's major decisions and the qualities that you appreciated most about them. Use these traits as homing signals for finding the next person who will help you achieve your professional goals. I hope these tips are as beneficial to you as they've been for me. Best wishes for professional success, and may you find all the right mentors to help you along the way! RESOURCES
Monique Guion-Kimball currently serves as Sales & Marketing Magic's Director of Making Stuff Work, under the awesome guidance of her mentor, Tami Siewruk. |
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